Thursday, January 17, 2013

I think I failed.

I've taken exactly 7 birth control pills. ONLY 7.

And all week I've gained weight. I've been working out 5-6 days a week and not even cheating. I thought I was doing well. So it must be the birth control? Right? Water weight? W

I thought I'd be under the weight limit with no problem. But if I keep on this path- I won't make it. How humiliating will it be to get on the scale in front of the nurse and my husband and have her tell me that I'm too heavy. I don't think I can do that.

So what do I do now? Crash diet? Cleanse? J says don't do anything drastic and just see what happens.

I feel like a huge failure. I tried all this time and I failed. I moved the dates, and I failed. I hate my body. I hate the way I look. I hate that I can't just have one thing work out. I wish I could quit.